A tough guy makes for nostalgic 80’s action!
I don’t know about you, but I think I’m starting to get over my nostalgia for the ’80s. I love the ’80s, especially the action movies of the ’80s, but what bothers me are all the digressions of the ’80s. I won’t mention any names, but some of these projects seem to exist mainly to refer to action movies from the 80’s without telling a story of their own. And frankly, with each new issue, it gets more boring.
But then something comes along to make my love for everything younger. Something that has just the right amount of love and passion for the genre in question, then puts just the right layer over it and has its own story to tell.
And that’s something… A tough guy.
The eBook of the ultimate action!
Shane Moxie: An ’80s action star who refuses to believe his best days are behind him….
Duke: A hyper-intelligent chimp and probably the greatest animal actor of his generation….
SYNOPSIS: When Moxie and Duke are targeted by assassins at the film’s anniversary screening, the conflicting stars reluctantly work together to dismantle an organized crime syndicate led by the legendary German action star, who ends his fast-food film franchise with extreme prejudice.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You really just read that. That’s what gives me life! Seriously, I live for this kind of thing! If you’re a fan of ’80s action, but with your own take on things, take a look at One Tough Bastard ! Now available for pre-order! Left at the end!
From Adam Howe, author of Die of Eat Hatchet and Tijuana Donkey and winner of the Stephen King Writing Contest, here is a buddy comedy in the tradition of Lethal Weapon, 48 Hours, Tango and Cash and a love letter to the glory days of the action films of the 80s and 90s. This bad guy will turn you into a sexy fucking tyrannosaurus… just like the guy who wrote it.
One Tough Bastard is a punch for the action films of the 80s and 90s, especially those of Joel Silver, whose work (Lethal Weapon, Die Hard, Predator, Roadhouse) made a big impression on me as a child; mixed with the kind of big, stupid comedies Hollywood used to make without fear of pain. It’s a Ready Player One for action dance, filled with Easter eggs from your favorite action movies. The main character – I hesitate to use the word hero – Shane Moxey (a.k.a. Shane Mox) is a cross between Kenny Powers, Steven Seagal and Jack Burton from Big Trouble in Little China; a legend in his own mind and a problem magnet. With the characters of Moxie and her chimpanzee partner Duke in Big Trouble, I tore the dynamic between Jack Burton and Wang, the suicidal hero and his more capable sidekick, and let the reader decide which of the two is the namesake of the book.
Although the book is primarily an action/comedy and reads like the movie we only wish Hollywood would still make, I was able to filter much of the madness of the last twenty-four years through the character of Moxie, a timeless man struggling to find his way in the modern world of Woke…… And with all the shit that happens in this clown world, is it really so hard to believe that an action star and an 80s chimp can save America?
Shane Moxey was born in Toad Sauk, Arkansas. He’s a waffler and a city devil. After falling asleep on a rigid regime of action movies and kung fu, Moxie trained to the level of a martial arts expert – all of them – and developed his own devastating fighting style. According to his own legend, Moxie served with distinction in several elite combat units after his victory in kumite (there is no record of his service, probably for reasons of national security). With nothing to prove, the champion of the underground, a self-proclaimed and decorated Special Forces hero, has seduced Hollywood. Moxie exploded on movie screens with One Tough Hombre in 1988, reaching the summer box office with Rocky Foot. The star of the day, Moxie, has signed a contract with Universal for the production of several films and has released a series of hits, including Amishing in Action, Gung Ho-Ho-Ho, American Sumo and Lambadass. Moxie’s career culminated in 1997 in the comedy Copsicle – Buddy Cave Cop, in which Moxie played with the greatest actor of his generation, Duke. Moxie’s bitter rivalry with her chimp has become a legend in Hollywood. Copsicle crashed at the cash register; if Moxie had made better career choices, he would have benefited from the longevity of Schwarzenegger and Stallone and would be remembered today. Instead, a combination of bad press caused by his feud with Duke, drug addiction, an unprovoked attack on American ninja actor Michael Dudikoff, and his upcoming film, the infamous KK Cup, would have ruined Moxie’s career. After KKKop caused riots across the country, Moxie’s contract with Universal was terminated; he was blacklisted by the major film studios and thrown into the Hollywood desert.
Today, Moxie makes occasional live video appearances (most recently Mosquitosaurus vs. Crabshark for SyFy) and reality TV (Celebrity Rehab) and patiently waits for Sylvester Stallone to hire him for the upcoming Expendables movie, with which he hopes to make his long-awaited comeback. If Sly reads this, Moxie can be reached at 555-7617.
He’s gonna blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow.
(Ed. Craig R. Baxley, 1993)
Donnie Womack, a traumatized veteran of the American invasion of Grenada, who atoned for his sins as Santa Salvation Army, is the only hope for hostages held by terrorists in a shopping mall on Christmas Eve. Another in the abundance of Die Hard scam and an ironic reach on the best Christmas movie lists. If the parents’ bands had been burned by the movie Silent Night, Deadly Night, nothing could have prepared them for Goon Ho-Ho-Ho’s ultra-hard Christmas. Highlights include a scooter turtle race through a supermarket, Moxie hitting a deer and a graphic love scene between Moxie and the cashiers in shock. The exciting sequel, Hanukkarnage, was hastily postponed after a moxie in Shtreimel and Tall and the leakage of a nasal prosthesis after screening tests.
Japan has just been bombed again!
(Dir. Mark L. Lester, 1995)
In an ongoing fight against phencyclidine addiction, made public after an unprovoked nightclub attack on action star Mikhail Dudikov, Moxie went to a lot of trouble. Sensitive to weight gain, he claimed to be a method actor in preparation for his next role; American Sumo was hastily constructed to support this lie. To avenge the murder of his brother, an Interpol agent, the great fortunate McCalla travels to Japan and infiltrates a sumo suicide syndicate run by yakuza. A scene in which Moxie fights a giant animatronic octopus in a tentacle porn studio and destroys an octopus-sized cephalopod with a hand grenade, followed by a joke by You’re calamari, motherfucker – a RiffTrax classic and an everlasting favourite among garbage film fans.
The toughest cops in prehistoric times…
A breather from the past to save the ’90s!
(Dir. John Landis, 1997)
48 hours of dating Encino Man… Preserved for centuries in a block of ice, cave agent Stone and his chimpanzee partner Boo thaw from their icy grave to capture their nemesis, a ruthless Neanderthal drug trafficker who is wreaking havoc in modern New York City. A comic explosion takes place while the cave workers try to adapt to the politically correct nineties.
A huge summer blockbuster and Moxie’s biggest hit. The stories about the feud between Moxie and his chimpanzee duke have become legends in Hollywood. The critic Roger Ebert wrote about Copicle: When he sees how Moxie stumbles over the role for which he was born – that of a caveman – he can only sympathize with his monkey-like co-star. Mr. Duke carries considerable dead weight Moxie, solidifying the image with a remarkable debut performance, and a season of shoo-in come awards that deserve much more than this otherwise disillusioned Drake.
One Tough Bastard can now be ordered here!
one tough bastard full movie online,one man's justice full movie,one tough bastard cast,one tough bastard full movie,one tough bastard (1996)